Thursday, November 24, 2005

Snippets

I seem to have a lot of free time or atleast seem to be giving people the impression that i do. I spend all my free time productively ofcourse! I read other people's blogs! For a long time, i could not understand why people would reveal their most private thoughts and feelings to the entire world(it is afterall the world wide web!). Perhaps it is no different from what they say about it being easy to talk to strangers. Or maybe its easy to be frank and open under the cloak of anonymity. Whatever it is, i made it a point that i would make my blog honest and forthright(all exaggerations are mostly obvious and are strictly for entertainment purposes only!) without revealing too much about me or my life.

But for some strange reason, i have had this irresistible urge to write something that means a lot to me. And thus was born a dilemma. How can i write about something about which i feel strongly and yet not be indiscrete? Well then i decided i would present to the reader, snippets of the last one and half years of my life. More specifically, these snippets will be parts of cerain conversations which have been burned into my memory. Why only the last one and half years, you may ask. For reasons best left unsaid, i have had the most singular experiences only during this time. It is but logical that i decided not to name any of the people involved. I will merely call them characters. Well, that isnt because i love plays or movies and look at my life as one, but simply becuase "character" happens to be what i call people instead of the wide vareity of other colourful words available for appropriate situations. So here goes.

Conversation 1
me: Hoity AS!
char1: Tidley LA!

Conversation 2
char2: I hope you like the gift. Open it and see.
me: (opening the gift) Oh wow! How did you ever know i would like something like this??
char2: Oh i managed to somehow find out!

Conversation 3
char3: You are so pretentious Anusha, i have never met anyone more pretentious. And you dont even have the guts to take a decision and stick to it.
me: Pretentious?? Thats the most unfair thing anyone has ever said to me! I dont want to continue this conversation anymore.
char3: Ah yes, run away from the fight. Thats what you are really good at, being a coward!

Conversation 4
char4: Your blog is very well written! My father thinks so too and wants me to give you the compliment.
me: Thank you. I guess that now, i have no excuse for not writing!

Conversation 5
char5: I am deeply disappointed with you, Anusha. When you said that you had thought about lots of things, i expected you to be able to answer my questions.
me: Well, i HAVE thought about things. If anything, you should be proud of me.
char5: (sarcastic laugh)

Conversation 6
char6: Congrats! I knew you would get it!
me: Oh well, i dont think its such a big deal, its too little and too late.
char6: What are you saying? Its wonderful! I am so proud of you Anusha!

Conversation 7
char7: I want to do something Anu. Let us formulate a strategy.
me: A strategy? Umm, i havent really thought about that.
char7: Dont worry, i shall help. I want to help you Anu, i am quite enthused! Lets come up with a brilliant diabolical plan!

Conversation 8
char8: She is pretty indeed, unfortunately she has a boyfriend.
me: Why should that bother you? Dont you have a girlfriend?
char8: Oh well, cant blame a guy for trying to make alternate plans!

Conversation 9
me: Ok, lets see, what i find most admirable in you is that you are always so amazingly optimistic and cheerful.
char9: I see. Well, what i like about you is your integrity, you have integrity in a way i cannot describe. Most people i meet are pseudo.

Conversation 10
char10: Dont let anyone do that to you Anu. Dont let anyone make you take a guilt trip. Been there done that, so i know.
me: I guess you are right. Thanks so much for being there.

Conversation 11
char11: You have changed after coming here. You have become so selfish.
me: Maybe its you who has changed after coming here. Think about it.

Conversation 12
char12: I wasnt expecting an answer from you. I know already. I just wanted to tell you anyway.
me: (after a long pause)I had a good time. Thank you.

Conversation 13
char13: I cant say that i wont ever have regrets. Yes, there will be times when i will see something and wish that my life had been different. But at the end of the day, i will be grateful for what i have.
me: I believe that when you realize what exactly you want from life, you will be sure that you wont have any regrets ever. Until then, you are merely settling for less than what you want and less than what you deserve.

In hindsight, i realize that this post would probably not mean much to anyone, not even if the characters i have mentioned recongnize that they are the ones being talked about. But chronicling these experiences has been a strangely fulfilling exercise for me.

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Life.

Alright, i think i have dabbled enough with humour or atleast attempts at humour! I think its high time i wrote something serious. For one thing, if one jokes too much, there is the danger of not being taken seriously ever! For another, as my good friend Jack would say, there would be no "spice in life"!

I thought long and hard about what i could write about. Then i realized that the thinking was consuming too much of my energy and decided that i would write about what most philosophers and want-to-be philosophers would form their first opinions on. Life. Even if i searched far and wide, i would not come up with a more complex, more abstract, more sought after, more debateable topic than this! Besides, life is so complicated and deep that no matter how many different perspectives have already been offered to explain it, one can come up with new insights if only one gave it enough thought. For any aspiring philosophers out there, i would suggest one important thing. Before you start ruminating on the meaning of life, do make sure that you have either already had a hearty meal or are in the middle of a light snack if the last meal has proven to be inadequate. I speak from experience; all this thinking just makes one terribly hungry! No wonder wise men have said that one needs food for thought!

Not that i have read many philosophical treatises. But i have definitely read people's home grown theories; the ones that appear in the middle of a long and involved story, usually followed by interesting insights into how the particular theory is going to help the protagonist get on with his/her life! The most prominent trend in these situations is to present an analogy. For example, life is like riding a bicycle, life is like a box of chocolates, life is like an onion(oh yes, ask me about it later and i shall explain that one!), life is a quest and so on. My favourite one is the one with the box of chocolates, for obvious reasons! So i decided that i would present an analogy too.

Well, i think that life is like sailing a ship. When its calm and peaceful, you have the most wonderful time and feel grateful for just being there. The sights and smells and sounds are so exquisite that you cant ever have enough of them. You refuse to think that even placid waters might one day turn into an angry and avenging force. But they do, and thats when your mettle is tested. To survive, you have to stay focussed and keep believing that you are going to see calm seas once again. But most importantly, you have to know when to hold on to the helm and fight against the elements and when to just let go. And if you survive, and the sea has raged itself out, life becomes wonderful once more. The sea tests you all the time, just like life does. Shallow waters, deep oceans, rocky enclaves, blinding storms, pirate ships(??) are all part of the same journey. It takes patience, fortitude, skill, hope and an unquenchable zest for exploration and adventure to live through it all.(Actually it all fits in beautifully and i believe i have come up with a near perfect analogy. Well, the only thing that i cant explain satisfactorily is this concept of sea-sickness! How can you explain life making people throw up?? Any suggestions?)

I have to admit that it might be possible that someone somewhere must have thought of this one too! After all, phrases like "troubled waters" "smooth sailing" and "at the helm of things" must have orginated from someone's imagination! But i swear that i didnt borrow this idea from anyone! You see, i came up with this one in my sleep! Right before the dream about prince charming sweeping me off my feet! Well, now you have to believe me right??

Monday, November 07, 2005

Dude flicks!

It was one saturday evening. Godmother, Godaunt and i were having our evening tea in the living room and talking about how to make the day more interesting. Like most other such Saturday discussions, we came up with the unique and original idea of "going out for a movie". At the mention of this plan, the three of us got lost in thought. While i was wondering if there were any good movies worth putting in the effort of getting dressed up and walking all the way to the theatre, Godmother was busy planning the details of the expedition. In just a couple of minutes she had decided in what order each of us should have a bath, how much time we should take for dinner and what time we should leave so as to give us enough time to buy tickets and get a drink at the theatre. But Godaunt seemed to be concentrating very hard; her brows were knitted, her eyes stared off into the distance and in time, her lips thinned as she seemed to make a firm decision. It turned out that she had decided to move the king of hearts instead of the seven of spades in her game of spider solitaire!

In the meantime Godmother had looked up the available options for the movie. "How about Wedding Crashers?" she asked. I thought about it and shook my head, "I dont think so. For one thing I have watched it already. For another, its just....its....well, i didnt like it." Godmother raised her eyebrows. "It has too many off colour jokes and innuendos for me take for a second time! You know its like...." And inspiration struck! "Its a dude flick!" I finished triumphantly. Godmother looked quizzically at me, but began to slowly grin as understanding started to dawn on her. Godaunt looked up from her game and asked, "Dudes? What? Where?" and looked around eagerly. Godmother explained that we had been talking about dude flicks. Godaunt seemed disappointed but nevertheless, she was curious about this "dude flick thing" as she called it. "Its the equivalent of a chick flick for guys!", Godmother elaborated. I jumped in to add, "Yeah, guys totally enjoy that kind of humour!" Godaunt gave up her game and became quite excited about this whole concept of dude flicks. "Is it like that movie? You know....the movie with that guy? He even acts in that other movie!" and she looked expectantly at us. Godmother and i looked back at Godaunt and waited patiently for her memory springs to start working. After a couple of moments, Godaunt jumped up from the couch. Godmother and i heaved sighs of relief when we realized that we didnt have to play "22 questions" to find this one! "Its called something...something about cakes or pies or something", Godaunt said as she gestured vigorously to prove the point. "You mean American pie?" asked Godmother, chuckling. Godaunt nodded and sat back on the couch exhausted but immensely satisfied. "Yeah, thats a dude flick alright!", i agreed.

All plans for "going out for a movie" were forgotten as we spent the rest of the evening listing all the "dude flicks" we had ever watched or heard of. Godaunt contributed quite a bit to it with "this movie" and "that movie" and other such movies! Here is the result of our efforts. Ofcourse, i have deliberately refrained from explicitly defining what a "dude flick" is. (Although the three of us have decided to patent the term, we are still working on a suitable defintion). But i am hoping that this list would self explanatory. I would be very grateful to the limited number of faithful readers of this blog, if they could add to this!

1. Wedding Crashers
2. The 40 year old virgin
3. American Pie
4. American wedding
5. Austin powers
6. There's something about Mary
7. Road trip
8. Dude, where's my car

PS:If you find this article possibly feministic, let me assure you that it IS! But its no more feministic than how chauvinistic the term "chick flick" is!