My Godmother and Godaunt

"How was your day?", I asked my Godmother as she walked into our apartment. "Worrsht!", she exclaimed. "My brats gave me a really tough time today!", she added by way of explanation. Her "brats", as she fondly liked to call them were the students taking the chemistry course she was a TA for. If they had "given her a tough time", it usually meant that they had asked her lots of silly questions in the chemistry lab. But then, they probably didnt mind being called brats, for once in a while, they got to have tasty titbits prepared by my Godmother, specifically for them. Given that she is quite talented in the culinery arts, i must say that her "brats" were in an enviable position! But let me rewind a bit and tell you how my Godmother came to be my Godmother in the first place. (It would produce more of an effect if the reader could imagine black and white concentric circles rotating around each other)

It was around 7 months back when i came to Tempe to meet my new roommates along with my anxious parents. At that time, my mother was quite convinced that an "innocent child" like me would get gobbled up by the big bad wolves of this world. The fact that i had stayed by myself during my undergraduation and had learnt more than i wanted to know about the big bad wolves, failed to allay her fears. My father had his own way of dealing with the situation. All along the drive from LA to Tempe, he adviced me on everything under the sun, nevertheless, ending each one with "I am sure you can take care of yourself". Thus, when they did meet her, they were suitably impressed with my Godmother. Well, frankly, knowing her as well as i do now, thats not surprising! My Godmother tackles everything and everyone in her typical no nonsense ways and proceeds to tell anyone who cares to listen, how she thinks things ought to be done. But what struck me most was her room. I had never in my life come across a room more well organized and maintained. I am sure that even if she was blindfolded, she would be able to pick the exact thing that she wanted! My mother, who is a born organizer and my dad, who is a cleanliness freak were bowled over, so much so that, they were confident that two full years in her company would surely result in my turning over a new leaf. In order to make this a certainty, they exhorted my Godmother to take me under her wing. My godmother was delighted by the prospect, as she had run out of prospective victims(or perhaps they had run away from her!) and conferred on herself, her present title.

Once my parents left, the obedient girl that I turn out to be for lack of creativity, i decided to put into practice atleast some out of the numerous pieces of advice so generously bestowed upon me. So, once i got a chance, I accosted my Godmother so i could clarify the n million questions about the place and the university that were brimming in my head. As it turned out, i didnt have to ask most of them. I just started with the basic, "What is registration all about", and my Godmother took over. As she started talking, it was all i could do to resist from taking notes! I suppose that the years of listening to lectures had ingrained in me an instinctive urge to grab a pen and paper and write something down, even if it made absolutely no sense later on. The next day, i was at school, armed with half a dozen maps and another half a dozen post-its with the itenarary for the entire week in my Godmother's tidy handwriting.

Godmother's penchant for order is most reflected in the fact that at this point of time the original colour of our refridgerator is almost indiscernible; on every visible part, she has stuck papers of all sizes and colours. These contain a variety of information starting from the procedures for cleaning the kitchen and the cooking and cleaning turns to the monthly accounts which Godmother takes great pains to meticulously calculate. We have two unwritten rules at the apartment: one, Godmother is always right and two, when in doubt refer to the fridge!

If at this point of time, one makes the mistake of assuming that she is a prim and proper, serious girl, one couldnt be further from the truth. My Godmother has an amazing sense of humour, something that comes in handy when i am in my characterestic "leg pulling" mood, usually brought on by an excess of tests and assignments! When she is not in a "zonked" mood, she regales us with interesting anecdotes about her illustrious friends. Since her friends' circle has quite a large diamter and most of them seemed to do something amusing or the other, we are kept well entertained! And well, one of the reasons that i have gone to such great lengths to stress upon Godmother's humourous side is that i am hoping that when she does read this article, this side will come into fore!

Contrary to how momentously my Godmother was christened, my Godaunt, who is my other roommate, came to be my Godaunt solely because i was looking to expand my "God" family. Since Godmothers are said to be quite generous in giving goodies and other nice trinkets, I figured that the more people i included in the family, the more my returns would be! Well, as it turned out, i was sadly mistaken. My trinket collection, to this day, remains abysmally small! But well, the titles just stuck on, nevertheless.

Anyone who knew my Godmother and Godaunt would agree that they were indeed at opposite ends of the spectrum. If my Godmother is the kind who planned the entire week in advance including the next weekend, my Godaunt is the type who believed that planning even the next minute was a waste of time. On a typical day, my Godaunt would try to do work that usually required 48 hours. Needless to say, at the end of almost everyday, she would complain that she was being extremely lazy and hadnt done anything productive. This would usually ellicit a raised eyebrow from me and an admonition from my Godmother. But fortunately for my Godaunt, she would have neither registered my amused expression nor heard my Godmother's scoldings, for her thoughts would have already gone on to something else.

One day, after a long deliberation, my Godmother and I came to the conclusion that my Godaunt, fed up with lowly mortals, had decided to hold conversations and consultations with only exalted contraptions like her PC, latop and PDA. Sometimes, if she was in the mood to talk to someone while she was cooking, she would relent and give the microwave and electric cooker a chance. Well, strange as it may seem, there seem to be no other explanation for the inexplicable incidents that happened at home when my Godaunt was around. One day, I was startled out of playing an extremely challenging game of text twist, by her impassioned cries. It seemed to me that annoyed with her work, she was giving the world in general, a piece of her mind. The kind hearted soul that i am, i did pity her laptop, which seemed to be taking the brunt of her attack. But as i watched her expressions and gestures, her words were quite unintelligible, it became clear to me that it wasnt annoyance but excitement which had brought on such a display. When she finally looked up from her work, i looked askance at her. She proceeded to explain that since enlightenment about a particularly difficult course of hers had finally dawned on her, she thought that it was perfectly natural for her to vociferously share the pleasure with her laptop. I nodded wisely and mentally confirmed the validity of the conclusions that my Godmother and I had already reached.

But no matter how deep she is buried in her deluge of assignments, my Godaunt is ever willing to take a snack break, especially if the snacks consisted of spicy Indian chaat items. When she takes such breaks, it is fascinating to see the look of absolute bliss on her face! Once during one of these times, generally bugged with life and not finding anyone else to take it out on, I started calling my Godaunt lots of interesting names, most of which translated to her being a useless imbecile. And all i got in response was a beatific smile! When it comes to food, my Godaunt is as proficient in consumption as my Godmother is at preparation!

I couldnt have asked for better roommates! Very rarely does one find so much entertainment in one's own home! The three of us have had many an escapade together, some of which i plan to write about later on. So till then, adieu!